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  Click here to go to the first staff post in this thread.   Thread: What Grinds Your Gears?

  1. #3131
    Senior Eduard's Avatar
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    I swear...
    One of the things I abhor the most is seeing siblings expressing the vilest of emotions towards one another, and resort to disdain, hatred, rivalry and sometimes even violence rather than coexist peacefully and protect one another.
    I personally value the concept of "family" as one of the greatest, most sacred treasures man can ever possess. I believe that family is one's first and final sanctuary, enclave. It is the first sanctuary as you are born into it, and it is also the last because once everything around you crumbles, and you drown into the necrotic pile of scatological manure facing impending downfall, there is nothing else but your family who is there for you.

    Therefore, it pains me to see people whose families are not like this, and instead, grow dysfunctional, hateful, decadent, degenerate and instead of protecting one another, they ostracize one another and deprave the harmony within the familial breast.
    For me, it is one of the most sorrowful sights I can ever behold.

    Today's morning, in fact, as I left the bus to pursue my daily routines I noticed this pair of children, a girl and a boy, between the ages 7 and 10, siblings, debarking alongside me. It struck me to see them nervous, unsettled only to see the boy punch his own sister in the face.
    I felt my blood boiling at that moment. Under all forms of etiquette, tradition, courtesy and education, such was unacceptable.
    The girl was crying. I could see the boy with conflicting emotions of anger and shame as one old woman scolded him. The boy replied to her rudely, unacceptably so.
    Five minutes passed, I passed the street, the pair was in front of me. Grabbed the boy by his ear, kindly pulled him towards the side of the walk, against a building's wall. I crouched to be at his level, so that I could talk with a calm yet scolding tone, without making a noise, because I do not like making noises.

    Had a very long talk with him where I told him to be ashamed of himself(among plenty other stuff), that it would be his duty as a brother to protect his sister from others and never to hit her again as they are family. I asked the boy to promise me never to hit his sister again and love one another. He promised me. I then asked him to excuse himself in front of her.
    Also found out they go to a school not far away.

    The entire rest of the day... I spent thinking about those two and what happened to/between them afterwards.

    There are not many things that make me fret, but seeing a dysfunctional family... or such forms of behaviour... between SIBLINGS... omfg.
    Last edited by Eduard; 05-15-2015 at 05:36 PM.

  2. #3132
    Senior Vae's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eduard View Post
    I swear...
    One of the things I abhor the most is seeing siblings expressing the vilest of emotions towards one another, and resort to disdain, hatred, rivalry and sometimes even violence rather than coexist peacefully and protect one another.
    I personally value the concept of "family" as one of the greatest, most sacred treasures man can ever possess. I believe that family is one's first and final sanctuary, enclave. It is the first sanctuary as you are born into it, and it is also the last because once everything around you crumbles, and you drown into the necrotic pile of scatological manure facing impending downfall, there is nothing else but your family who is there for you.
    I don't really back this mindset, because people will have conflict, regardless of whether or not they came out of the same genetic pool. Being related isn't some magic "cure-all" for chemistry and personal history.
    You find comfort in the idea that it's a structure to find support from, but not everyone will, and not everyone will want to, because people and their personal struggles are different.

    And to expect otherwise because of "tradition" is kind of limiting to analyzing and understanding the causes of why these conflicts happen, and being accommodating towards them, in turn, when it's appropriate.

    (For instance, you see a child yelling at their parent. You might be inclined to think "How disrespectful! They should show respect!"
    But you'd have no idea about that child's home life. You'd have no idea if that parent was physically or emotionally abusive when they got home. You'd have no idea how things operate between them behind closed doors.)

    That last tidbit is actually something I ran into quite commonly when I was growing up, because I was angry and loud with my parents.
    And people would attempt to call me out on it, before (if) they learned why I did that.
    Because I had perfectly legitimate reasons for it.

    It might make you angry, because of your own personal experiences with familial ties, or whatever, it's not my place to tell you your reasons.
    But don't place that expectation upon everyone.
    People's life experiences are different. A family conflict can be the product of a pileup of bad experiences that has lasted for generations. And while that's not a good thing, and while I'm certainly not excusing that child in your example from punching the other, I just feel like trying to make assumptions that they should "get along" at all times is horribly dismissive to both the unique personal histories that shape us into what we are, and the unique personalities that determine how we process these histories.

    That, and forcing people to "get along" just because of a familial connection is... pretty unrealistic.
    No one should be forced to like someone they don't want to.
    That touches of "You're not allowed to feel what you want to," and your sense of traditions should've override a person's rights over their own emotions and associations.
    Last edited by Vae; 05-15-2015 at 08:36 PM.
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  3. #3133
    Premium User Krespo's Avatar


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    PS3 download and install times. It's been twelve hours already.

  4. #3134
    Senior Rilvor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Krespo View Post
    PS3 download and install times. It's been twelve hours already.
    Obligatory No Gaems reference.

    As far as the current discussion goes I have little that I wish to offer on the matter, other than people should most certainly never harm one another and at least maintain politeness in the face of disdain. But as Vae said, it can be a very complicated matter that is most certainly tinted by one's own life experiences.

  5. #3135
    Senior Damian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vae View Post
    I don't really back this mindset, because people will have conflict, regardless of whether or not they came out of the same genetic pool. Being related isn't some magic "cure-all" for chemistry and personal history.
    You find comfort in the idea that it's a structure to find support from, but not everyone will, and not everyone will want to, because people and their personal struggles are different.

    And to expect otherwise because of "tradition" is kind of limiting to analyzing and understanding the causes of why these conflicts happen, and being accommodating towards them, in turn, when it's appropriate.

    (For instance, you see a child yelling at their parent. You might be inclined to think "How disrespectful! They should show respect!"
    But you'd have no idea about that child's home life. You'd have no idea if that parent was physically or emotionally abusive when they got home. You'd have no idea how things operate between them behind closed doors.)

    That last tidbit is actually something I ran into quite commonly when I was growing up, because I was angry and loud with my parents.
    And people would attempt to call me out on it, before (if) they learned why I did that.
    Because I had perfectly legitimate reasons for it.

    It might make you angry, because of your own personal experiences with familial ties, or whatever, it's not my place to tell you your reasons.
    But don't place that expectation upon everyone.
    People's life experiences are different. A family conflict can be the product of a pileup of bad experiences that has lasted for generations. And while that's not a good thing, and while I'm certainly not excusing that child in your example from punching the other, I just feel like trying to make assumptions that they should "get along" at all times is horribly dismissive to both the unique personal histories that shape us into what we are, and the unique personalities that determine how we process these histories.

    That, and forcing people to "get along" just because of a familial connection is... pretty unrealistic.
    No one should be forced to like someone they don't want to.
    That touches of "You're not allowed to feel what you want to," and your sense of traditions should've override a person's rights over their own emotions and associations.
    Quoting for absolute truth. I have no siblings to speak of but pretty much my entire side of my mom's family are just backstabbing vain and just overall unpleasant. Needless to say because of them i cannot and will not trust family because of genetics
    We all have our demons. If we're not fighting them, then we've befriended them.

  6. #3136
    That's me! Hewge's Avatar

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    Yeeeah. Dismissing anything and everything about people "because family" isn't something I'd do.
    People are people, and people can be terrible. Just because sometimes they're related, doesn't make it all magically better and acceptable :v

  7. #3137
    Senior Damian's Avatar
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    So my happy feeling mood is gone and replaced with loneliness and jealousy and self loathing again. I hate feelings.
    We all have our demons. If we're not fighting them, then we've befriended them.

  8. #3138
    Senior Zeitzbach's Avatar
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    The uneducated trying to argue using their "Experience and point of view"

    Seriously, fuck off with inductive reasoning in order to support your point of view. Inferring doesn't give you a 100% correct conclusion (Not all crows are black just because you saw nothing but black crows) and trying to argue based on that conclusion you came up with while denying everything is a major bitch to deal with.

  9. #3139
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    Last edited by Viciviser; 05-19-2015 at 02:22 AM.

  10. #3140
    Senior Umbra_Exe's Avatar
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    I finally got a DVI cable, so that I could plug in an extra monitor for displaying reference pics/Skype while I draw...Trying to get my tablet pen cursor to map properly to the bottom monitor is frustrating.

    Also, while looking for a solution on the maker's website, I found out they've just announced a newer, better version of the monitor I bought, for pretty much the same price...

    I just bought this one back in January. :/
    I'm happy with this one, but I'm still sort of wishing I waited now... Ah well.
    Last edited by Umbra_Exe; 05-19-2015 at 03:04 AM. Reason: Typo

 

 

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